Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Alienation.

Good friends we have, and oh well!
Good friends we’ve lost! yeah-yeah!
Along...the way! yeah!
In this great future, yeah!
you can’t forget your past!
Oh, dry your tears I say!

Bob Marley - No Woman No Cry

As days go by I feel increasingly alienated from people. I know this has a huge negative impact on my mental health but everyone just seems so... shallow these days. I can't stand to talk to them because I see myself in them.

In all honesty, I hate clubbing and I never did see the point in that. I prefer quiet nights at a coffeeshop lounging with a couple of close friends, then after that doing some rash act on some stupid impulse, then regretting it 2 days later but still not giving a shit anyway.

That's the shit that brings people closer together. It's ironic that I'm directing a film focusing on human relationships but yet, that aspect of my life is in shambles.

Gosh this seems like an anti-club rant. It really isn't. I just feel that people should bother about each other more. I'm really sick of people calling me up just to ask me for favours. Seldom do I get a call simply just asking me how I'm doing and shit like that. No, I still wouldn't hang out with you but at least now you're off my shitlist.

Hah even then, the first thing I ask is, 'Okay get to the point, what do you want from me?'.

I feel like a shell of my former self. I wouldn't mind if I leave this place with my family and never come back because there isn't much here anyway. I'd blame it all on society but then again, society's made up of people. It's a vicious cycle heh.

But then again, I always had this thing about not getting close to people so uh maybe the fault is my own.

It doesn't matter either way.


It's amazing how the photos I take sometimes contrast myself as a person. No, this picture is defective because of the glare but I like it that way. It's more comforting to know that nothing's ever perfect.

1 Comments:

Blogger Babymoselle said...

so do YOU call people and ask how they are? Sometimes we expect things from others that we don't do ourselves you know..

9:15 PM  

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